the egg is now in a nest made of shitty swords and soft puppet ass

• It is delicious french fried wieners, you must eat. Bonus points for the cup of ketchup countersunk into a hole in a cabbage head.
• Meat. You’re right in liking it. OH THANK GOD, IT FELT SO WRONG. (Brought to you by the American Meat Institute.)
• A young Richard D. James endorses Van Camp’s Pork and Beans.
• HERE COMES A SPECIAL FLYING BUS
• There were clearly not enough potato lifeboats to save all of these peas.
• Mister Pickle takes a dip. …in Shell Industrial Lubricants, apparently.
• Okay, maybe meat isn’t so right after all. At least this meat isn’t. D:
• Oh my God what the HELL is this
• Theories on what’s going to happen in about five minutes: discuss. Tell me it’s not just my dirty mind at work here.
• This one seems innocuous enough… until you notice the huge barbecue fork in the dude’s hand, and then you realize it’s an episode of Cold Case waiting to happen.
• THE BEANS, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD RUN TO THE BEANS
• This kid is about two seconds away from a service dog and Braille funnybooks.
• A pumpkin, a sharp knife, and beer. No, this totally isn’t a horrible accident in the making.
• Oh God, I’d heard the horror stories about C-rations, but I had no idea.
• WTF is it with creepy kids and Pork-N-Beans, man?
• SRSLY
• OM NOM NOM NOM
• Boiled dinner. …no, thank you D:
• I’m guessing this ad probably wouldn’t fly today.
• Sir, if you’re into that sort of thing that’s your business, but I’d rather not hear about it.

Originally published at Fire of Unknown Origin. You can comment here or there.